Playing It Again

“I don’t understand. Why is she angry him?”

 I asked my mother the first time we played Uncharted 2 together. The words left my mouth as Chloe was telling Drake to get off the train he had just heroically fought/chimed his way through to save her. By all regards she should have been swooning over him. That’s the way videogames work. Hero saves the girl and then the girl falls for him. It happened in Uncharted 1, why not now? 

“She is upset that he didn’t trust her. That Drake thought she needed saving,” my mother responded. 

One of the wonderful things that Uncharted 2 does is that does not tell a conventional videogame story. It tells the story of a group of people related through love and hatred and the complicated relationship between them. Chloe was angry with Drake because that is what happens in a real relationship when trust is broken. People become angry. 

To a lot of people that seems like a basic concept, but I didn’t understand it. The first time my mother and I played Uncharted 2 I was 14 years old. I had not had a relationship then. The closest I ever came to romance with a girl was holding her hand. The intricacies of a relationship and the emotional twists and turns that it can be were foreign to me. I still liked Uncharted 2. The train sequence is phenomenal but I ranked Uncharted 2 as my least favorite of the Uncharted series. Uncharted 1’s story about wooing the girl and falling in love made sense to me. I had seen it a thousand times before. The love story is the most popular story in American society. Uncharted 3’s story about the father/son relationship between Drake and Sully was something I could connect with. In both tales the characters were people I understood. It was not so with Uncharted 2.

Complicated emotions like jealousy, bitterness, resentment and even love were hard for my 14 year old mind to comprehend. Relationship were when tow people love each other, right? Then why was Chloe angry with Drake? The question was searing into my brain, not only did I not understand why she felt that way, but the very concept of aggravation at the person you love was new to me. So far out of my understanding were was this story that I had to stop the game in its most dramatic moment to ask my mother why? Looking back now it is easy to see how naïve I was. Yet, at the time it was the biggest confounder to me. In so many words before I become repetitive, the complicated natures of relationships were so foreign a concept to me that it detracted from my enjoyment of the game. 

And now I must take a brief aside. Just stick with me. 

I would like to apologize for not updating in what feels like forever. In actuality is has only been three or so weeks but these past weeks were some of the hardest weeks in my life. A lot of high pressure situations arose that had to be taken care of. I would go into further detail, but I promised myself that this would remain an intelligent blog about videogames and not my melodrama of a life. There is one thing that you, dear readers, need to know. Over the course of the past three or four weeks my relationship ended. Things were said, feelings were hurt and it was not pretty or clean. I adored this girl and she adored me. Still, it did not work. If I could go back and change it I just might. But the past is behind me. The tears have been shed. I am slowly starting to feel whole again.

But it was important for you to know that. Now back to the article.

 Recently, I started playing Uncharted 2 again. No particular reason, I just wanted to. But this time I played it different things crossed my mind. In the past I concerned my self with headshots and finding treasures. This time I paid attention to every line of dialogue, every nuance in the characters animation, the subtleties that convey real emotion. I found myself thinking that it was a damn shame what happened between Drake and Chloe. This time I could understand, comprehend and emphasize with both Drake and Chloe. Her angry was understandable, relatable. His devotion which I had not really seen before now stood stark and clear in my mind. It wasn’t that Drake did not trust Chloe; it was that he cared too much to let her go. 

It was not the game that had changed. It was me, the player. Because of what I have experienced in the last there years from 14 to 17 I understand relationships. I have felt heartbreak. I have known the purest of joy. No longer is love just a concept to me. With age and experience comes wisdom. 

Now, I do understand that the concept of a seventeen year old talking about wisdom from age is enough to make anyone stand up and scream “hypocrite”, but I do mean it.  From when I first played Uncharted 2 till now, I have grown and matured. That change affects the way I see the game. Depths previously hidden to me are now open and the emotional force behind the game is so much clearer.  The delicate balance between obligation and dedication, between affection and aggression and the fine line that is trust I comprehend. Because I have been there before. 

And this is the reason I replay my games. Beyond that fact that I like to play them again, each and every game has replay value. Not because of unlockables or bonus game modes, but because of the changes in the player. Games are finite and unchangeable, once they have been experienced for the first time it can never be that way again. Kind of like love. But as the player changes and grows so too does the games impact and meaning.  Original, I ranked Uncharted 2 as the lowest in the series. Now, however, my understanding of the game has changed. I have grown and hold within myself a deeper understanding of love, loss and relationships. If I were to rank them again, would Uncharted 2 move from its position at the bottom? Perhaps. Let’s wait till I finish it a second time. 

Once thing is certain though, what I will take away from Uncharted 2 this time will be different from I did the first time. The game has not changed, but I have.